What prompts a teenager to be sexually active?
He: It is a “macho” thing …like a conquest. It creates the image of a guy who is more of a man and not just an adolescent.
She: It is something romantic…the girl feels she is special to the guy…it’s her way of showing love, or even proving her love for him.
Do teenagers feel pressurized to have sex?
He: Yes… Sex has become the “in-thing”…it’s available, it’s enjoyable, your peer group indulges in it…if you don’t “do it”, there must be something lacking in you…so, there is pressure.
She: There’s an eagerness to fall in love…to find Prince Charming. A girl feels more desirable, more attractive when she has a guy. When a guy persuades her that “a relationship” must include sex…she readily believes it is the way to deepen and strengthen the relationship.
Why is casual sex appealing to the youth?
He: A guy is always ready for sex…the one-night stand is appealing because it involves no commitment and no ugly break-ups…. the “no strings attached” concept heightens the appeal.
She: It makes a girl feel popular, non-traditionalist, modern. It’s now the done thing…look at Sex in the City…one doesn’t need to be in a relationship to have sex.
What are the disadvantages of having casual sex?
He: It slowly robs one of self-respect….while boosting the male ego. A guy given to casual sex shows a lack of concern, respect and responsibility towards girls. Sex becomes a mere game.
She: One loses the sense of idealism…reality bites early and harshly. Sex becomes a game for the girl also…..she often uses it to get what she wants, and she often succeeds in getting what she wants, but in the process, she loses her self-esteem.
Do you feel that studies get affected by sex, whether casual or not?
He: Yes, studies lose priority. Studies require a sense of dedication and commitment. Sex makes it difficult to focus on studies. The teenage years are crucial for studying regularly and planning a future…but when sex enters the picture, these best years get wasted.
She: When a girl gets emotionally involved at a young age, it becomes an obsession and she finds it difficult to concentrate on her studies…. all her attention is centered on the guy.
What if sex leads to pregnancy?
He: That’s a big problem. If the relationship was only casual, I’d wonder if the baby’s really mine. If the relationship was serious, I would persuade her to have an abortion to resolve the problem.
She: That’s scary…in fact, that’s the one big fear for the girls….and it always keeps her tense regarding her menstrual cycle. There is no way in which a pregnancy can be handled alone or with just a boyfriend…It will involve telling family and friends…that’s a nightmare.
Before having sex, do you feel it necessary to take precaution by using a condom?
He: Especially for the first time, a guy is unprepared. The opportunity comes suddenly, in the heat of the moment…something unplanned…one doesn’t even think of pregnancy or STD or HIV/AIDS.
She: Especially for the first time, a girl is reluctant to even suggest that he wear a condom, though she may be aware of the consequences of such carelessness. She is carried away by the magic of the moment.
Now that you are aware of the problems such as teen pregnancies, would you refrain from sex if you don’t have a condom?
He: Yes, I am shocked at the statistics in our country. 74% of all illegitimate births occur among women from 15-19…and one-third of young females conceive before marriage.
Besides, using a condom helps prevent the spread of Sexually Transmitted Disease and HIV/AIDS.
She: If I wanted to have sex, I’d make sure to carry some condoms myself…it is better to be safeguard one’s health….it is shocking that 36% of the 400,000 induced abortions occur in the young women’s group! Early pregnancy, abortion, STD, HIV/AIDS must be guarded against at all costs.
Obviously, “He” and “She” have a different take on issues of sex and relationships. Advocates for Youth firmly believe it would be best for teenage girls and boys to first form bonds of respect, trust and friendship -- the first three bases -- before beginning that “special” relationship.
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